Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The truth about the H1N1 virus

H1N1. Sounds like a name of an experimental protoype/eco-friendly engine to me (hydrogen-nitrogen virus ver.1 or something to that effect. I'm an chemical engineering illiterate, so excuse me Bren & Whe). On a serious note, the friendly neighborhood Wikipedia defines Swine Flu as (also called swine flu, hog flu, and pig flu) an infection of a host animal by any one of several specific types of microscopic organisms called "swine influenza virus". In 2009 the media labeled the disease as "swine flu" as it is caused by 2009's new strain of A/H1N1 pandemic virus. The origin of this new strain is still unknown. Or rather, more probably, the same has yet to be made public.


Relatively recent events taken together however, enlightened me.

On August 20, 2007 Department of Agriculture officers investigated the outbreak of swine flu in Nueva Ecija and some other areas in Central Luzon. The mortality rate is less than 10% for swine flu, unless there are complications like hog cholera. On July 27, 2007, the Philippine National Meat Inspection Service (NMIS) raised a hog cholera "red alert" warning over Metro Manila and 5 regions of Luzon after the disease spread to backyard pig farms in Bulacan and Pampanga, even if these areas tested negative for the swine flu virus.

A couple of days ago, I met a Japanese student-researcher named Shinji Mikami at a local bar. Since I am a fan of all things Japanese, I talked to him in earnest. To my surprise, and only after a few bottles of the disgusting light beer he was drinking, he told me his story and the reason why he was here in the Philippines. The following are his exact words (I have perfect dictation memory):


"When I first came to the Philippines, I studied at Kalayaan College and at the same time I had a job interview at a Japanese Scientific Research company. After studying in Kalayaan College, I started to work in that Japanese company in SBFZ. Actually it was my first job and I was assigned to take charge of the ChemLab even though I was still young and had no experience and knowledge concerning Bio-engineering work. To gain the confidence of my staff as their boss was quite hard for me at first but I discussed and worked with them closely and gradually gained their trust. Although I was the only Japanese scientist in the Olongapo facility, I didn’t feel lonely at all and I didn’t think of escaping from my difficult circumstances, thanks to my beloved staff. What I found difficult in the Olongapo Lab was that most of the staff speak corrupted English and mostly Tagalog (Filipino language) which I don’t understand well. Communication with the members was indeed very difficult for me then. Traveling from Olongapo to Manila, it takes around 3 hours. After every meeting I attended in Manila, I took a bus going back to Olongapo city even though everyone advised me not to take a bus during nighttime. I was able to muster up courage and do this because I was chanting in the trip all the way from Manila for safety. My stay and the research activities I did in Olongapo are my most unforgettable memories. I will never forget them with my sincerest gratitude for loving and accepting me as one of their own fellows.

Later on, or on January 2007, I came back to Japan and my bosses there gave me a new assignment. We (the Olongapo team) were to conduct research on a "Miracle Vaccine" that can actually prevent HIV from mutating into full blown AIDS. The vaccine's function is to slow the growth of the deadly virus 1000 times. Meaning, if it normally takes the HIV to mature into AIDS in about 5-10 years, if we are successful, we can delay that into 5,000 to 10,000 years, or well beyond the life expectancy of any human. For this, we needed to transfer to a bigger facilty at Nueva Ecija. With coordination with CLSU (Central Luzon State University) the company I work for set up a high-technology bio-engineering laboratory just in the outskirts of the university. There we conducted test on the vaccine on pigs, since the pigs are fairly affordable compared to chimpanzees, and closer to the human physiology than mice. For the first month, we were getting all our desired results, we tested the vaccine on swine and got very little side-effects. Just a little flu-like symptoms which can be cured by advanced ordinary medicine. However, I did not know that time that some members of our staff at Nueva Ecija were doing some things behind my back. Instead of disposing the pigs we used up like I told them to, a couple of Filipino employees were selling the discarded test subjects to lechon stands, the nearby public markets, and some to backyard pig farmers. When I learned that, I fired them but it was already too late. I found out later on that the side effect of the vaccine was not ordinary flu, afterall.


The side-effect is what I have come to known as the Progenitor virus, also known as the Founder or Mother virus, and is the first of the mutagenic viruses I have discovered since then, and the basis for all of the ones that followed. The Progenitor virus produces rapid and uncontrollable mutation in a host's genetic code, but the mutations were not coordinated enough to produce effective and controllable effects. In hosts with a genetic structure less complex than humans, mutations are less pronounced, and usually restricted to photosensitivity coupled with increases in size and aggression.


(Mutations? Photosensitivity? Increases in size and aggression? WTF?!?)


Shinji continued: I also found out that our Japan counterparts have succeeded in creating the Tyrant or "T" virus at the Soka University Facility on March 12, 2007 through synthesis of the Progenitor virus and leech DNA. Through this synthesis, the photosensitivity of the early Progenitor strain was replaced with pyrosensitivity, a property that can be seen in most of the series' enemies. The T virus allegedly operates similarly to most other viruses, but also has the abilities to reanimate dead tissue, to substantially mutate its host, and to infect nearly any tissue in any type of host. It animates dead tissue by killing and replacing any mitochondria in infected cells, and then combining with these cells to produce enough energy for motor and lower brain functions. By doing this, most of the body's systems, such as the circulatory or respiratory systems, are made redundant. However, this process has the drawback of severe necrosis in the host, and produces the distinctive rotted appearance of most test subjects. The mutations are produced when the virus incorporates itself into the host's genetic code and considerably alters it. Creatures with genetic structures different than humans generally show less severe mutations, and usually only increase in size. I further learned that the Japan facility were experimenting on people. But don't worry, they told me that they only use Koreans and sometimes filthy Arabs.


As a side effect of the virus' consumption of its host, specifically its digestion of the host's frontal lobes, all hosts suffer from increased aggression. The virus also damages the hypothalamus, which results in a flood of neurotransmitters, enzymes, and hormones which induce a psychopathic rage and hunger in the host. The Tyrant or T virus was further developed in our labs in Mexico, since the cost of running our operation there is cheaper compared to Japan, and come to think of it, Mexican test-subjects are really like Koreans and Arabs: cheap and disposable. Human test-subjects are disposed of in the proper manner everytime, after all. All those N1H1 casualty reports seen at CNN are not caused by the virus but of the highly effective human-subject diposal drug which the company developed to make it look like a death which originates from a massive influenza seizure.


(Psychopathic rage and hunger?!? Human-testing and disposal?!? I almost spilled my drink in disbelief)


Things went seriously wrong after the first quarter of this year. Some Americans were infected by a modified strain of the T virus from an infected pig. Some drunk kid from Anaheim apparently copulated with the swine in our facility in Cancun and later on infected most people staying in the hotel he was staying in. The recent reports about N1H1 are all about the weak variant of the T virus. The T virus however, has the capacity to evolve over time. I have told you in the beginning of my story that we were developing a vaccine designed to stunt the development if the HIV virus 1,000 times, right? The T virus is just the same. If it takes a normal flu virus 3 days to incubate, the T virus, however weak it is will evolve into its mature form at 1,000 times the slower than the speed of a normal flu virus, or 3,000 days. In short, those infected today with the so-called N1H1 virus will become similar to movie zombies about 3,000 days from the time they first contracted the infection. That is the reason why despite 70+ infections of "N1H1" in this country has been reported, no one yet has died. 3,000 days from now, not only will these people will die, but they will become the undead. Within 5 years, the restof the world will be infected, and within 15 to 20 years, those who have not developed a natural immunity to the T virus will either become dead or undead. So good luck to you, kaibiganu."


Shinji left the bar but not without paying for my bill along with his own. About 10 seconds after he left, I pulled out my cellphone from my jacket pocket and called God.


Me: "Hello, uhm, God, being omniscient and all, can you tell me if the crazy shit, er, I mean stuff the Japanese dude told me was true?"


God: "The things he said, my son, are NOTHING BUT A LOAD OF CRAP."


Me: "Oh. Ok, later God. Thanks." After punching in the "end call" button, I realized something nothing short of an ephiphany: Such is my belief of God. I always believe in everything he says to me. Everything else is just a load of crap.