La nuova sporgenza

"The new boss." That's what the blog title means in Sicilian. I mean, in Italian.
(Left: Carlo Gambino's picture taken in the 1930s)

Last Monday, I reported for work at the RTC (Regional Trial Court), and not out-of-the-ordinary, my boss, the Judge, was running late. It was a criminal case day. This particular branch (Br.6) has been specifically designated as an SCC (Special Criminal Court) for Dangerous Drugs related cases. In short, our branch is the bottom of the stinking viper pit, and I, answerable only to the judge, am the pit boss. The courtroom was already sprawling with caught hoodlums--in neon green DETAINEE shirts, hand-cuffed as couples and smelling like stink-bombs from 1990's Gary Lising's joke shop. (I think there were 28 or 29 of them detainee fuckers that day.) Present too are some of their relatives and friends, most of whom look poor and jobless. Then there are some uniformed Policemen, sans their sidearms--who were supposed to take the witness stand that day. These pigs are prohibited to carry any firearm within the vicinity of the RTC. Also present are the provincial and city jail-guards, who unlike the cops, are permitted to carry their guns. (I am not sure as to the reason behind the distinction, and whether or not the evil sought to be prevented by the measure is actually prevented.) There are lawyers of all sorts, from the old and sickly looking to the really old and sickly. All the (court) branch employees are there, some of us having snacks, some pretending to be doing something important, some just staring into the abyss, and some, particularly me and this PAO (Public Attorney's Office) lawyer I have just met, and whose fucking name I cannot remember, were shooting bull and smokin' cigs to pass the time away. This lousy schmuck was smokin' Winstons and I was glad I had a pack of Marlboros. BTW, smoking is strictly prohibited within the confines of the RTC compound.

On or about 10:30 a.m., I saw the red 2007 Sentra my new boss drives to work. You see, I have a lot of respect for this man, as he is mine and my wife's padrino, ( ninong, godfather) at our wedding. He is also the father of one of my closest friends, Atty. JS, the best man in my wedding. Aside from that, my boss is also a member of the family--another widow's son like my grandfather, my father, my uncles, their friends, and the friends of their friends. He is a brother of my father and uncles from a different mother--if you now what I mean. He's a made guy. He's connected. He has been raised more than a few years back, but a whole lot later in time than my father. My father sent me to work for him for a while. Until I grow my bones, at the least.

Instantly, I entered the courtroom before he comes in and reviewed the court calendar. After having triple-checked the day's calendar to know who's here and ready from those not here, to those notified and those with no proof of notification, I waited there amongst the sea of green smelly shirts inside our non-air-conditioned sala. After about ten (10) stinking minutes I have endured, the boss has yet to come out from his chambers. Impatiently, I stormed out of the courtroom to check on him. He wasn't inside his SCRA (Supreme Court Reports) and PR (Philippine Reports) filled room. Instead, I found the boss standing at the front door which was open, with his arms on his waist and it looked like that he was more than moderately pissed.

Instead of proceeding to his chambers, he ordered the RTC security guard and a couple of clerks to find out the name, and license plate number of a certain 2007 ceramic white Mitsubishi Strada parked across the street of the court building. Apparently, he had an on-road altercation with its driver. That is why he was standing at the door. When I asked him what happened, he told me "Aba eh gusto akong i-run off the road! wang-wang pa ng wang-wang at bunubusinahan at tinututukan ako. Ang ginawa ko, pinauna ko na at sinundan ko, akalain mong dito pa sa harap ng RTC paparada. Baka mamaya ako ang gustong tirahin nyan talaga. Kung ganoon eh ang malas naman niya."

This is what happened. Boss lives at Sta. Maria, Bulacan. That being the case, he takes the NLEX (North Luzon Expressway) everyday, entering at Bocaue and exiting at the Tabang interchange. This guy in the white Strada, for a reason unknown to any except himself, kind of dangerously tail-gated boss's red Sentra and wanked his siren and horn repeatedly, perhaps to make the boss give way to his stupidity-induced charge as the boss was about to exit the tollgate at Tabang. He continued doing this crazy-ass stunt until the boss gave way, right after their convoy has reached the confines of Malolos territory. The boss followed the white Strada and coincidentally, the Strada was also headed to the Capitol grounds, where the RTC compound is likewise located. The boss told me he felt it was going to be a hit. Damn, I haven't received the SC (Supreme Court) appointment papers yet and my boss is gonna be hit already? I hoped not. No, I prayed not.

While the RTC sikyu was, upon the boss's orders, talking to the driver of the suspect vehicle, the boss left my side and proceeded to his car. He opened the driver-side door and reached for something found inside the glove box. It was his nickel-plated Colt M-1911 copy .45 caliber pistol sheathed in its old-school looking holster. He took out the piece, cocked it, and placed it in the back of his pants. Afterwards, he began his approach to the pick-up truck. I didn't follow him because I was naked. I was packing very light. All I had was my Parker fountain pen which has my name engraved on its shaft.

Meanwhile, the driver of the Strada must've thought he was done talking to the rent-a-cop and decided to start his engine and leave like his ass was on fire. Boy, did he fuck over the wrong fella. I have to admit, sometimes, I did that sort of shit when I was younger but fortunately, I haven't screwed guys that mattered--'fya know what I mean. Pa always warned me that someday, out of road-rage, some random tough guy will knock the balls out of an asshole driver like I was. That's part of the reason I quit being an asshole driver. Another part is that I ran-over a six (6) year old kid some years back. The boy lived, and the family paid good money to fix the kid up and keep me out of jail. I had to be a lawyer.

After facts unfolded, we learned that the driver was a "back-up" (trans.: bodyguard) of a child of the Governor. His name is Too Damn Dumb. The boss's car plates say 16-C 6. The boss immediately called up the Governor's secretary, demanding the head of Mr. Too Damn Dumb on a silver platter. The boss called up a couple of other people inside his chambers, all of whom are friends of the family.

Out of twenty-eight (28) scheduled trials on the day's calendar, we heard just one. Hell, IMHO, nobody is in a hurry to acquit these disconnected and unaffiliated drug thugs into the streets. BTW, the prosecutor's nose bled --from the heat perhaps. Or maybe he was just damn too old and sickly to be doing his job. Beside his portfolio of cases, he had a mini medicine cabinet which are labeled by the hour (7:00 am, 8:00 am, 9:00 am, and so on and so forth). He must have diseases which surely surpasses the total amount of the remaining black hairs on his head. We had our recess at 12:00 and after a short meeting with him--mostly comprised of him telling me what he wants done and when he wants it done--the boss said he had other affairs to attend to and left the building. With nothing left to do that cannot be procrastinated until the next day, I followed suit and left early too. On the way home, I called up my Pa. He also had a laugh about this story when he heard it. I imagined my old man shaking his head and laughing at the same time.

Bunot Fernando!

Mental Note: I better get a PTC (Permit to Carry) real soon. There are a million asshole drivers these days. One or two might just get unlucky and stupid enough to try to fuck me over.

The Rainmaker's take on the government, the russian mob, and cheap-ass zombies

A friend--a learned law school professor--taught me once, when I was still one of her students that Marcos institutionalized graft and corruption within the framework of the Philippine government. That may be true, but while the late strongman Marcos these days is as stiff as my dick on a Sunday morning--lying there chilled in his goddam glass sarcophagus in forgottenland--the cumulative ill-effects on Philippine governmental culture still haunts us Filipinos to this very day. The government has mutated from being the organization where the will of the people are formulated, expressed and realized to just The Organization whose workings are very similar to that of the Russian mob.

Here's a little background on the Ruskie mob: The breakthrough for the so-called Russian Mafia occurred during the economic disaster and mass emigration of the 1990s that followed the fall of the Soviet Union. Many former government officials turned to crime, others joined the large numbers of Soviet citizens who moved overseas primarily to the United States and the Mafia became a natural extension of this trend. Former KGB agents, sportsmen and veterans of the Afghan and Chechen Wars, now finding themselves out-of-work but with experience in areas which could prove useful in crime, joined the increasing crime wave. The Russian Mob's own members have been known to call their crime group "Организация" ("The Organization").

However, unlike the Russian mob, notorious for its underground operations and clean transactions, the crime organizations operating under the cloak of Philippine government is not known for its secrecy and non-flamboyant manner. These assholes have no shame whatsoever. Under the guise of a republican government, these motherfuckers are characteristically sloppy and have no sense of honor in any sense of the word. Endless barrages of mudslinging and all sorts of dirty tactics have exposed almost each and every one politician as a corrupt crook. I am sure you have all seen the imp and her evil houseband's picture at ZTE's. The Palace admitted that the picture was legit but tried to dismiss the controversial issue as "a mere social call with ZTE officials" and that it "should not be blown out of proportion." A social call my ass. Further, it is my good looks that should not be blown out of proportion, not the ZTE scandal. (BTW, some movie and TV guy in the past told me to call him if I ever wanted to be an artista when I was a teen-ager, but my father said he would disown me and strip me off my heritage if I jumped in the swine-pit world of show-business. So here I am, a lawyer for the public and the default consigliere for the family.) In the Senate, the government pawns who testified under the Senate Blue Ribbon Committee denied all allegations that their boss ever had a meeting with ZTE bigwigs. Now which is which? I understand that the evidence against the duende are circusmstantial, but the rules of evidence provide under Section 4 of Rule 133, that--

Circumstantial evidence is sufficient for conviction if:

(a)There is more than one circumstance;

(b)The facts from which the inferences are derived are proven; and

(c)The combination of all the circumstances is such as to produce a conviction beyond reasonable doubt.

What more can we ask for? An open court admission? Let's get real. Even a street thief wouldn't do such a thing. At least not without some torture or threat of an ass-fucking. Maybe that's what GMA needs, a threat of an ass-fucking by the multitudes of people she had screwed.

Just a few months ago, I was listening to my morning shows on the car's AM radio and I heard one funny-ass comment from Erap. He said something to this effect: "The GMA administration is like a book with a very thick cover. They are very good at making cover-ups." Erap sure has his moments. I almost rammed the goddam jeepney in front of me as I was laughing my dick off after hearing that ridiculous interview. Funny shit, but that goes deep man. Fuckin' Deep. Some friends of mine, not me, but some friends I have believe that president evil and her organization of filthy ass amateur crooks are responsible for the Glorietta bombing, the sky-rocketing oil price hikes, the rice crisis, and even our huge-ass electric bills. They insist that all of these problems we are facing are the brainchild of the government aimed at covering up the multi-million dollar scams they pull on us every single fuckin' time the opportunity arises. I do not agree. They are not that smart. Certainly, they are not part of the solution and part of the goddam general problem but I think it is hasty and erroneous to conclude that they are the proximate cause of these problems. If I believe that they are, I'd probably holding an automatic Kalashnikov (IMO the new tommy gun) right now and not my fountain pen.

Corruption is defined (in Wikipedia) as a general concept describing any organized, interdependent system in which part of the system is either not performing duties it was originally intended to, or performing them in an improper way, to the detriment of the system's original purpose. Its original meaning has connotations of evil, malignance, sickness, and loss of innocence or purity. The corruption in the Philippines is so deeply rooted, that if you trace back its origin, you'd end up in Spain. And, if you go back further, you'll find its origins in China. I do not want to talk about that aspect of this topic because I know, that even if I do not look it, I might have some Spanish or Chinese blood flowing through my veins, like most Flips.

Corruption is a dysfunction which encompasses bribery, extortion, cronyism, nepotism, patronage, graft, and embezzlement. Rizal said it is a disease similar to cancer with no known cure. Some cancers have vaccines now and some are made currently curable by the advances made by modern medicine. Perhaps the martyr's description has become inaccurate for our times. Perhaps corruption is like a zombie bite. Once you get bitten, you transform into an undead zombie like zombie movie-nuts see in those cheap-ass zombie movies. If that's the case, the only way to cure the corrupted is to blow its head off with a shotgun or cut the damn thing with a bad-ass motorized chain-saw. The only problem is that in those zombie movies, everybody else but the hero and the girl dies. Only they see the sunlight after the overnight onslaught. Now who's the gonna be the hero and the girl? Not me. I'm just a family man who has friends who have some more friends. I cannot afford to play hero and try to chop zombie heads. I just hope the family and these zombies can do business. If not, let's just say that someday maybe I'll make them an offer even they cannot refuse.

Mediocrity

The traditional formulation of the Copernican mediocrity principle is usually played out in the following way: Ancients of the Middle East and west once thought that the Earth was at the center of the universe, but Copernicus proposed that the Sun was at the center. This heliocentric view was confirmed a hundred years later by Galileo, who demonstrated with a telescope that Jupiter's moons orbited Jupiter and that Venus must orbit the Sun. In the 1930s, RJ Trumpler found that the solar system was not at the center of the Milky Way Galaxy (as Jacobus Kapteyn claimed), but 56% of the way out to the rim of the galaxy's core. In the mid-twentieth century, George Gamow (et al.) showed that although it appears that our Galaxy is at the center of an expanding universe (in accordance with Hubble's law), every point in space experiences the same phenomenon. And, at the end of the twentieth century, Geoff Marcy and colleagues discovered that extrasolar planets are quite common, putting to rest the idea that the Sun is unusual in having planets. In short, Copernican mediocrity is a series of astronomical findings that the Earth is a relatively ordinary planet orbiting a relatively ordinary star in a relatively ordinary galaxy which is one of countless others in a giant universe, possibly within an infinite multiverse. (Source: wikipedia)

As a way of life, I despise mediocrity. I always try to strive to be the best at what I do. More accurately, I set a standard for myself which is always above the average. That way of thinking is what led me away from the sport of basketball. As a child, I loved the game. I even had an authentic green laminated Boston Celtics poster proudly displayed on a wall in my (well, mine and my brother's) room. I played varsity ball for elementary school. I thought I was really good. I scored an average of 8-12 points a game and had about the same number of assists as an off-guard. On my first year of high school, my hoop dreams were shattered. I transferred back to the University of Santo Tomas (I started elementary school there, but transferred to Bulacan). I was 12 years old and had classmates as tall as PBA players. All the kids who played basketball were at least 5'8" on their freshmen year. A couple were as big as 6' tall. I got my fair share of hard bumps, sharp falls, and nasty basket rejections. That resulted to a whole lot of (kid) brawls for me. No one could make me look like a fool even as a kid without risking having my foot in his ass. I decided after 3 or 4 games (fights) with these kids that basketball, although I enjoyed the game very much, was not mine. I found out that basketball was not for everyone. That game is only for the tall. Don't get me wrong, I'm no pip-squeak, I'm about as tall as Robert Downey Jr., or George Clooney--just not basketball tall. (Maybe soon I'll post a blog entry about basketball and perhaps other sports)

When I was born, I was the center of the universe for my parents, my grand-parents, my uncles and aunts. I am the first-born son among my brothers, sisters and all first cousins. I was their Copernican sun. When my first-born son (or daughter) is born this November, he (or she) would be like me, first-born among all in his generation. He (or she) will become our Copernican sun. If drowning on the depths of mediocrity means having your own dreams made flesh, then I would love to be labeled mediocre. I can't wait to see my reflection at the sparkle of my baby's eyes.

Project POGI part 1: Change of heart

The blue 1995 Honda EG Civic LX me and my wife drive badly needs a make-over. It is a 13 year old car and hasn't been through any major face-lifts or general overhauls. Why? That's because the Civic is a very reliable car. The stock engine hasn't broken down all these years and all the major parts that has been replaced are the master brake and the left side mirror which was crushed by my lovely wife in a little accident she had a few years back. Although I prefer a "sleeper" look in cars--the way they look right out of the factory--and hate PIMP MY RIDE and FAST AND THE FURIOUS looking autos, I think its about high time we give this car the pampering and special treatment it deserves. He is christened by my wife as Pogi after all. For more information on the car, visit http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honda_Civic

Part 1. Engine Swap
The 1995 (Ph) EG Civic LX has a 16-valve 1.5L non-VTEC non-fuel injected (carb) engine. Its engine code is Ph15. Since it has a carb style fuel delivery system, it wastes more fuel compared to that of a similar displacement but fuel-injected model. Moreover, we can't use the bio-ethanol shit that Shell sells at a cheaper price.

1995 LX carb engine (PH15)

"The primary functional difference between carburetors and fuel injection is that fuel injection atomizes the fuel by forcibly pumping it through a small nozzle under high pressure, while a carburetor relies on the vacuum created by intake air rushing through it to add the fuel to the airstream. The functional objectives for fuel injection systems can vary. All share the central task of supplying fuel to the combustion process, but it is a design decision how a particular system will be optimized. There are several competing objectives such as:

• power output
• fuel efficiency
• emissions performance
• ability to accommodate alternative fuels
• reliability
• driveability and smooth operation
• initial cost
• maintenance cost
• diagnostic capability
• range of environmental operation

Certain combinations of these goals are conflicting, and it is impractical for a single engine control system to fully optimize all criteria simultaneously. In practice, automotive engineers strive to best satisfy a customer's needs competitively. The modern digital electronic fuel injection system is far more capable at optimizing these competing objectives than a carburetor." (source: wikipedia)

After deciding to change the LX's power plant, the question which arises is this: What engine should I choose? Fortunately, I am not the first schmuck who has attempted to do this kind of thing. It is a common and general practice among low to mid-end Civic (generally, the Type-R folk do not fit in this category) owners all around the world to change their stock engines with something better. There are as many choices of engines as there are Civic variants--from the cheapest Ph16 ESi to the fastest and most expensive K20A found on the current FD Type-R. In choosing the right engine for the LX, there are two things I greatly consider to be the main factors: 1) performance; and 2) cost. I don't care if its the fastest one available if it costs more than my car, like the K20. But I also don't care how cheap it is if it won't meet my needs in fuel efficiency and velocity. Taking into consideration those important elements in making my selection, I have narrowed my choices into five (5) engines: The D15b2, D16A6 (ZC VTEC), D15B VTEC-E, D15B EK3 (D15Z7) and the famous B16A2. These three (5) are all VTEC engines. VTEC (Variable Valve Timing and Lift Electronic Control) is a valvetrain system developed by Honda to improve the volumetric efficiency of a four-stroke internal combustion engine. This system uses two camshaft profiles and electronically selects between the profiles. (To learn more about VTEC technology, you can visit these sites: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/VTEC; http://auto.howstuffworks.com/question229.htm; http://asia.vtec.net/spfeature/vtecimpl/vtec1.html)

D15B2
The D15B2 was produced for the Honda Civic VTi (EG4) in the years 1991-1999. The D15B2 is one of the more popular used Honda engines sought out by tuners today. The D15B has always been in the shadow of its larger, more powerful 1.6l brothers--perhaps due to the popularity of the B series engine by way of the Type-R monsters Honda, Mugen, and Spoon had popularized during the nineties. Nevertheless, the VTEC D15B is a very significant engine variant because Honda used VTEC to make it possible to generate as much power as a DOHC (double overhead camshaft) design from its SOHC (single overhead camshaft) configuration. Thus the VTEC-D15B generates 130ps and redlines at 7200rpm, ably replacing the DOHC ZC design despite having 100cc less displacement and one cam-shaft less! Also frequently overlooked is the fact that with 130ps from 1.5l, the specific output of the VTEC D15B is 87ps/l which actually compares favorably with the larger capacity DOHC VTEC designs such as the BB1 Prelude's H22A. The specific output of the VTEC D15B is in fact higher than the 190ps version of the H22A used on the previous generation Accord SiR. This type of engine can be purchased locally at Kanzai surplus (http://www.kanzaisurplus.tk/) or any other car parts shop in Banawe or elsewhere which sells JDM (Japan Domestic Market) shit at a cost ranging from 27 to 30k PhP, then you may trade your stock engine as payment for the installation on your car.


a light-tuned D15B2 engine


D16A6 (JDM ZC)
The ZC VTEC is the JDM counterpart of the D16A6 engine. Its origin can be traced to the 1988-1991 EF Civics and CRX's. Basically, it is the 1.6L brother of the D15, with slightly more torque and consumes a little more fuel. I think this engine sells at about the same price range (or possibly even cheaper) as the JDM D15Bs at Banawe or Evangelista shops.


a modded D16A6 (ZC) on a 1996 EK sedan

D15B VTEC-E
The D15B VTEC-E is the economy implementation variant of the D15B series engine. It has slightly lower horsepower but consumes less fuel. When VTEC became available, two versions of VTEC D15Bs were developed for the EG-series (1991-1995) Civic. One is the well-knowned VTEC-E which delivered an incredible 20+km/l mileage. The other is the VTEC D15B, a power implementation. The VTEC-E variant costs about the same as a power implementation D15B but harder to find in local JDM importers since it is not a tuning engine in the strict sense. It is just not a typical "rice boy" engine since its focus is on fuel economy and not velocity.

fuel efficient D15 VTEC-E

D15B EK3 (D15z7)
For the EK-generation Civics, development on the D15B engine finally culminated in the now famous 3-stage VTEC D15B. This engine was used on the 6th generation Civic EK3 VTi and Ferio Vi. 3-Stage VTEC D15B is a wonder engine in that Honda took the technologies of the VTEC-E and VTEC-D15B engines and merged them into one single engine. This implementation allowed Honda to give us an engine that is both economical and powerful. Although with the same amount of max Hp and Torque, the other D15B is quicker as it reaches its peak at a lower RPM than the 3-stage. The 3-stage VTEC system was only offered in the Asian markets and not in the US market at all.

D15B EK3 (D15z7) 3 stage VTEC

B16A2
"The B-series Honda DOHC engines are popular automotive engines from the modern series of Honda engines. They are good performers from the factory having models with around 126hp to around 200hp, with even some models having a redline over 8,900 rpm. They accept high performance modifications well without much risk to reliability." (source: Wikipedia) The B16A2 was produced for the Honda Civic Si in the years 1999 -2000. The B16A2 is one of the more popular used Honda engines sought out by tuners today. It also costs double compared to that of a D15b. It is commonly found on local EK SiRs and the EK JDM Si and its highly praised B & C variants are on USDM and JDM Civic Type-Rs from 1996-2000. To know more about this venerated Honda power plant, click: http://www.hondatuningmagazine.com/tech/0203ht_acura_honda_b_series_engine/index.html


B16A2 (with B16C valve cover)

I have not yet decided on which of these engines I would choose to purchase and install on the LX. I know this change might possibly bring more problems than satisfaction--afterall, they are not new engines but rebuilt or surplus--so I am really careful on making the decision. Maybe I'll talk to CP of H3 for some advice. He recently built a 1990 CRX with a K20 engine. Hopefully, by the end of the year the LX will have a new power plant. So folks, feel free to type in your comments if you have any insights on this engine-swap deal I am planning.

Coming soon: Dancing Shoes (suspension & wheel tuning).

Note: ...now my blog sort of looks like an old crappy issue of sport compact car magazine.

Mugen Power!

Mugen Motorsports (M-TEC Co., Ltd) (無限) is a Japanese company formed in 1973 by Hirotoshi Honda, the son of Honda Motor Company founder Soichiro Honda, and Masao Kimura. Mugen, meaning "Without Limit", or "Unlimited", (hence the commonly placed word "Power" after, denoting "Unlimited Power") is an engine tuner and parts manufacturer closely associated with the Honda Motor Company. Despite the family connections, however, Mugen is not, and has never been, owned by Honda. Things were complicated for some time as Mugen was owned and run by Hirotoshi Honda, who has been the major shareholder in Honda since his father's death in 1991. (source: wikipedia)



The photo above is the current incarnation of the Mugen Civic.



The Mugen Civic Type-R in action

Happyness

Have ya'll seen that Will Smith movie, "The pursuit of happyness"? Do you know what it tells us? It tells us that happiness can be bought. All the struggles that he and his family went through was by reason of the lack of fuckin' money. He ain't got no dough to pay the rent, to pay the daycare for his kid, keep his wife happy, et cetera, et cetera. The motherfucker was a goddam loser. Then he turned his life around. He got it around by makin' money. All that shitty movie ever was about was money. We're all fools cryin' while watchin' and old Willie is at his Malibu mansion sippin' Crystal thinkin' we're suckers.

For me, happiness is a state of mind. It is a by-product of freedom. It is a state of mind because we only know it inside our heads. Looking happy and actually being happy are not the same animals. I believe that "Hindi lahat ng gusto nating gawin, pwede...at may mga kailangan tayong gawin, kahit hindi natin gusto." (We can't do everything we want, and we need to do some things even if we don't want them.) If we are doing more of the things that we want compared to those that we need to do but don't want, then we are happy. If we are stuck with doing the things we need to do but don't want, we're unhappy. The freedom to do the things we want is the yardstick of happiness.