Thursday, June 5, 2008

Esoterica Filipina

Esoteric knowledge is that which is specialized or advanced in nature, available only to a narrow circle of "enlightened", "initiated", or highly educated people. (Source: wikipedia)

Henry Ford, the great American philanthropist said, "All History is Bunk." All history is written by the victors of conflict, to record their posterity, and not as completely accurate and comprehensive account of facts. What many people believe as doctrine are mostly half-truths and distortions of the same.

Philippine history is no different. I have learned from Prof. Ignacio (Hmmn...she always does that mid-sentence), my History 1 & 2 teacher in UP that the tons of information I was fed from DECS (Department of Education Culture and Sports) approved history and social science textbooks in elementary and High School are mostly lies. Before college, I have never heard of the phrases, "Divide and Conquer" or "Pueblo Syndrome."

FYI, Divide and Conquer, was part of the general strategem employed here in our islands by the Spaniards during the colonial times. Since the Philippine Islands comprises an archipelago, its different ancient peoples have been separated and isolated from each other for a long time since the technologies to build big river crossing bridges and convenient sea faring vessels were not easily available during those times. Natural borders comprising of seas, rivers, mountains and hills prevented one "tribe" from mingling with another. The Spanish sons o' bitches saw this and capitalized on this phenomenon. They did not build bridges. They did not make inter-island travel easier by providing cheap sea ferry travel. All they did was collect taxes to build unneeded churches. So the Taga-ilogs (Tagalogs) seldom mingled with the Capampangans and almost never with the Visayans during the time of Diego Silang. As a result, a native brand of racism started to brew. Tagalogs began to stupidly look down on Visayans and Muslims from Mindanao.

Your ancestors' surnames were part of the Divide and Conquer plan. Governor General Narciso Clavería y Zaldúa issued a decree called the Catálogo alfabético de apellidos (Alphabetical Catalog of Surnames) on November 21, 1849. Apart from the fact that the list was not alphabetical, a more sinister motive prompted the inclusion of ridiculous names in that list including, but not limited to Gajasa (gahasa; rape, rash), Bayot (Cebuano: homosexual), Bacla (bakla; homosexual), Otot (utot; flatulence), Tanga (stupid), Limotin (limutin; forgetful), Lubut (Cebuano: buttocks), Tae (excrement), Ongoy (unggoy; monkey), Aso (dog), Jalimao (halimaw; monster)and Yyac (iiyak; will cry).

This is how it worked: a copy of the catalog was distributed to the provincial heads of the archipelago. From there, a certain number of surnames, based on population, were sent to each barangay's parish priest. The head of each barangay, along with another town official or two, was present when the father or the oldest person in each family chose a surname for his or her family. Often, it was the parish priest who chose the name for the indio. These ass-wipes made the funny names available to those tribes that do not comprehend its meaning in another dialect. They gave Visayans the surname Ticol and the Ilocanos Bayot. They were like naming dogs. Curiously, my ancestors names of Garcia, Salvador, Lopez, and Meneses were not in that book. Maybe my ancestors didn't have to pick a name for themselves because they already have one. Or maybe, one or two of my maiden ninunos were fucked by some bald-ass friar from Aragon. I hope not.

All this talk of surnames reminds me of a legal story told by one crazy-ass professor I had in Law School: Professor JS., otherwise known as the self-proclaimed Kevin Costner of the Philippines. He has no resemblance to the the Californian who played Elliot Ness and Wyatt Earp. If there is any celebrity who bears a likeness, then that would be Rico J. Puno or if Spanky Rigor stayed out in the sun too long, maybe. The story goes as follows: A certain fellow, whose name appears in his birth certificate as Juan Biglanggahasa approached Prof. JS, and sought legal advice if he could do something to change his name because according to him, the name was the constant source of ridicule and public humiliation. In turn, Prof. JS accepted Mr. Biglanggahasa as a client and filed a petition in court under Rule 103 of the Rules of Court (Change of Name). The court granted the petition and thus changed the name of the petitioner to Johnny Biglanggahasa. (Laugh now, please. I beg you)

Now, do you ever wonder why that anywhere you go in the Philippines, especially in towns that were already in existence during the Spanish Imperial era, the town centers are laid out almost the same everywhere? In every town there is a town hall, across the street an old Catholic Church, and beside the church, a school run by either priests or nuns belonging to some Catholic order originating from Europe, mostly Spain. All around these ancient dated structures are the ancestral houses of the rich folk. I am not talking about the noveau, but those who had old money, those who were rich before the first world war. Some of them may no longer be rich, and some may have migrated to Forbes Park or wherever-the-fuck the rich live these days--how would I know? I came from a family who treasure honor more than money. My grandfather would rather pay his debts either the mah-johng or card table with a parcel of land he owned rather than be labeled a balasubas. He had a palabra. But my grandmother--God bless her poor soul-- taught me that palabra de honor does not put food on the table. Anyway, this town lay-out common throughout the country did not occur by chance, or by imitation. The same was by design.

The Castilian word pueblo, evolved from the Latin word populus ("people"), means "village".On the central Spanish meseta the unit of settlement was and is the pueblo; that is to say, the large nucleated village surrounded by its own fields, with no outlying farms, separated from its neighbours by some considerable distance, sometimes as much as ten miles or so. The town was nuclear. Meaning, each town was designed so that nobody had to leave town and go to other pueblos because they were all fuckin' the same. This syndrome further enhanced the rift between the different tribes of the colonial Philippines. Thus, when a country is divided, it is much easier to conquer. And conquered it they did. The rest is history. Or is it? You tell me.

Just the tip of the iceberg.